Follow your own muse

Ever feel like life is pulling you in a direction you do not understand?
Most times it is confusing as shit, a constant argument between your heart and your head.  

Your heart- it wants what it wants, a gravitational pull that you blindly follow, it feels good, it feels right, no thought process, just deep instinct to pull forward. But is it for the best reasons? is it selfish to want what you want? How do you know? 

Your head- the logical counterpart to your heart, it thinks steps through, it foresees possible outcomes and weighs in on the percentages of success and failure for each prompt that the heart wants.  But is it right to leave nothing to chance? Are we finishing the song in our mind without ever singing one word?

These are my ying and yang and for many others a constant circle of round and round, The heart, The mind, back and forth.

Do i know the answers for you? I don't. I wish I did, then perhaps someone out there would know the answers for me. 

 I am at constant war with myself. 
My heart calls me away over and over.
Travel lights my fire. I do not know what it is I'm looking for, but I know it requires a plane to get there. lol.

I have found a great purpose in filming animals and the people of the world who help them. I love their stories. 
I  know with all my heart that my life purpose is here somewhere. It is so close that i feel it in all that I am.
 Is it in Africa?
​Of that I am 100% sure.

I knew that the very first time I stepped onto African soil, the energy pulled me deeper and deeper into its roots. I knew I was home. I knew that it was here I would leave my life mark, but who's story am I suppose to share?
What story will be the one that changes everything?  Is it mine? Is it someone else's? 
That I do not  know. 
The mind says, stay home, you have a great business and career, you have a family and friends who love you. Home is safe, I know this, I know the end result.  How can I risk it all for a heart pull?  
I guess for me, How can I not? 
Is it scary as heck? Yes! I know the risks I take, I know I travel to an un certain future. Even as I type, my mind combats my heart, throwing doubt my way. What are you doing? you are a fool! don't be selfish! You always want more more more!  Just be happy with what you have, many want your life! 
I am almost in tears with the pinball affect my mind plays. 
​

I bounced all the factors back in forth in my mind, as any good person would right? but in the end it was a prompt to just do it, that my heart lead the charge on and the mind politely followed.

I am afraid to dare to dream and I am also brave enough to dare to dream. 

So I have booked my trip Africa for this fall.

I am full of hope, dreams, love, fear and most important purpose.

For what is a life without it. 

So if I may offer advice, let it be the same words I gave myself. 

There are no second chances at life, you have this one, live every moment with the same zest and fire as though it were your last day on earth. Take the chance. You feel the way you do for a reason, if you do not do it now, Your heart will keep pushing it forward until it can't be denied. May as well give into it now and love every stinking second, for once we get there and see the reason for it all, we will wish we had done it sooner. 

​xoxoxoxox

​Monique